Childhood Neglect Shamed You into Believing that Half-Love is all You Deserve |
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Click image to watch on YouTube. |
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When parents made it a problem that you needed their love and attention, there’s a big risk that you internalized the belief that there’s something “wrong” and “dirty” and “shameful” about you and your feelings.
When you grew up learning that people who expect loyalty and honesty only create horrible arguments at home, you may have trained yourself not to need loyalty and honesty—not to expect much—or not to admit that you long for someone to love you and commit to you.
And then—of course—what happens? You don’t get someone who loves you and commits to you.
Making the transformation inside so that you accept and honor what you really want in a relationship—even when it means that you walk away from someone you love—it requires courageous honesty with yourself and with other people.
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Weekly Update on Cases of Measles |
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As of April 3, 2025, a total of 607 confirmed cases of measles have been reported by twenty-two (22) jurisdictions in the United States: Alaska, California, Colorado, Florida, Georgia, Kansas, Kentucky, Maryland, Michigan, Minnesota, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York City, New York State, Ohio, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, Tennessee, Texas, Vermont, and Washington.
There have been six (6) outbreaks (defined as three [3] or more related cases) reported in 2025 and 93% of confirmed cases (567 of 607) are outbreak-associated.
Total Cases 607
Age (Years) <5: 196 (32%) 5-19: 240 (40%) >20: 159 (26%) Unknown: 12 (2%)
Hospitalizations <5: 21% (42 of 196) 5-19: 8% (19 of 240) >20: 8% (12 of 159) Unknown: 8% (1 of 12)
Deaths 2
Vaccination Status One dose: 1% Two doses: 2% Unvaccinated/Unknown: 97%
Source: CDC (Abridged/Edited)
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Is Past Trauma Creating New Trauma? |
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If you were abused or neglected in your childhood, your nervous system may now have an injury (neurological dysregulation). In adulthood, this injury can manifest as self-defeating behaviors, and those listed below are common for people who have complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD).
When you learn the basic tools for healing dysregulation and other neurological aspects of trauma, it’s easier to change these patterns.
Consider dysregulation as a state of trauma-induced unconsciousness that occurs under stress. Click here or here for some great videos that explain neurological dysregulation and emotional dysregulation.
Don’t be discouraged! Remember that healing is possible.
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Common Self-Defeating Behaviors |
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Blame | Difficulty recognizing your role in problems; constant victim mentality (attributing your problems to external factors or other people, rather than taking responsibility for your own actions or decisions); bitterness; slandering others; and/or belief that all problems are the result of a country, a race, racism itself, sexism, foreigners, a political party, religion, lack of religion, certain foods, your parents, etc. |
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Neglect of Self | Inappropriate or “shabby” clothes (for your socioeconomic status); poor hygiene; neglect of physical exercise; and/or avoidance of medical and/or dental care. |
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Substance Use | Reliance on alcohol or drugs to relieve stress and/or taking more or different medication than prescribed. |
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Addictive Use of Food | Frequently binging on carbohydrates; unhealthy weight; eating disorders; and/or obsession with “correct” eating. |
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Irritability | Frequent arguments; falling out with friends, neighbors, partners, and/or family; ranting; rage; mistreatment of others; revenge; and/or violence. |
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Dishonesty | Extreme, unrealistic exaggeration; hiding important, personal truths or preferences; lying, stealing, infidelity; and/or tax evasion or other illegal activity. |
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Fantasy | Habitually escaping from reality when things are tough or unfavorable; not in touch with reality; failure to take reasonable action; huge, unrealistic expectations and promises; inflating the importance of relationships, events, personal attributes, and prospects; obsession and/or stalking; and/or neglect of health, work, or family. |
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Polarized Thinking | Attraction to extreme views, groups, authority figures, and belief systems; outrage at the news; inability to disagree or step back from conflict; dominating others; slandering others; and/or cutting off contact with friends, family, or people outside your group of close relationships. |
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Abuse of Sexuality | Overly-sexualized appearance and conduct; loss of dignity, emotional security, or the ability to be “real” around sex, intimacy, and/or relationship dynamics; doing things that you don’t want to do or that make you feel ashamed; and/or unwanted pregnancy or compulsive sexual behavior. |
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